Gossip is rampant in my knowledge of teen-aged drama. I got talking about this with my partner and we remembered being taught the Golden Rule when we were very young. “Treat others as we would like to be treated”.
I think this rule has been helpful to us in many ways, but it’s caused us some reluctance to have challenging conversations as well. No one wants to be challenged, so challenging someone else is against the Golden Rule. No one wants to feel uncomfortable in a conversation. No one wants to hurt someone’s feelings because it’s against the Golden Rule, so how can we deal with the challenging conversations we feel prompted to have, with past mental wiring that we shouldn’t make other people feel bad, because its against the Golden Rule?
Today more than ever, we need to practice and master the art of how to carry out difficult discussions in a way that will produce a good result in the end.
Until we do that, what do we do with feedback we have for people, suggestions to help them improve, or the hurt they may have caused us? Often, these things are channelled into gossip.
People are just not courageous enough to have the right conversations with the right people to make sure that they aren’t gossiping. Remember that if you ‘Stand Up, Speak Up and Master Your World’ you will rid yourself of unspoken resentment, and stand in integrity by having had challenging conversations to resolve conflict.
Wouldn’t it be better if people treated each other the way they wanted to be treated, with honest conversations that lead to problem solving and working out differences, rather than gossiping?