Leadership tips

Balance Empathy and Assertiveness

balance empathy and assertiveness with Penny Tremblay

For an effective result in resolving conflict or negotiation, seeking an effective balance between empathy and assertiveness is valuable. People think that you have to choose either to be empathic or assertive, but the good news is you can have both and here’s how.

Empathy involves the ability to understand the other person’s perspective and to express their viewpoint in a manner that doesn’t judge their opinion.

Assertiveness is the ability to express your own viewpoint, including your perspective, your interests and your needs.

With the balance of these two actions, you’ll be off to a great start with your approach to resolving conflict.

balance empathy and assertiveness with Penny Tremblay

Show Empathy

Prepare for empathy by giving the other party the opportunity to speak first while you listen without judgment. Your only intention is understanding. Restating what you heard and ensuring you’re listening does not necessarily mean that you agree, eg. “I hear that you feel I was selfish in using the corporate vehicle that you had reserved on that day.”

Preparing yourself is important because there may be triggers to your emotions. You may feel disrespected by the issues creating the conflict, unheard, or misunderstood, or you may feel competition or feel like shutting down and avoiding the conversation to resolve the conflict altogether.

Demonstrate Assertiveness

Taking some time to think and create responses for scenarios to help you practice them. Say them out loud to help yourself replace unproductive messages with more constructive and rewarding ones. Communicate what you want, why it matters and how you can help the other party meet their needs.

This is where your practice and rehearsal will be valuable. The clearer you are on the list of key points you want to make, the better you’ll be prepared to speak about them.

Want to learn more about managing workplace relationships and conflict? Our online-live training program for managers and supervisors is running in November. Four interactive sessions led by Workplace Relationships Expert, Penny Tremblay.

Current and relevant information, stories, role-plays, and exercises will provide practice and lasting impact. Group collaboration will provide broad insight for all attending.

Don’t miss this one; register today.

See you there in the virtual classroom.

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